Write, Fail, Repeat: The Writer’s Guide to Failing Better

by Rochelle Melander

“Nothing is a mistake. There’s no win and no fail. There’s only make.”

—Corita Kent

My clients have talked a lot about failure lately.

They plan, choose a path, and it doesn’t work out.

They insist they’ve failed.

I encourage them to think of the situation as feedback.

Making art has much to teach us about how to make use of failure.

On NPR’s Morning Edition, A Martínez interviewed members of The Groundlings, a Los Angeles-based improv and sketch comedy troupe. Michael Churven said this about the process,

“You bomb so much, and your best teacher is your last bomb. I’ve never learned so much as when I failed miserably on the stage, ’cause you learn firstly to just let it go, which I think is a key ingredient. And secondly, it forces you to think, OK, what was missing in that sketch?”

Wow. Instead of fearing failure, Churven embraces it. He learns from it. He uses it to figure out how to create better sketches.

When I teach art and writing to young people, I see so many students who fear failing. They have this idea in their head about what a perfect piece would look or sound like. When they can’t execute it—and most of us don’t get it right on the first try—they give up. Why try if they’re just going to fail?

You might face the same problem. You show up to write, jot down a few words, and stop—because they don’t match the image in your head. And here’s the thing: it’s not your fault. We live in an Instagram world, where we watch artists and writers make art. It looks like they get it right the first time, and brilliantly so.

Maybe. We’re only seeing the final product. We don’t see the hundreds of takes they tossed out.

We’re comparing our messy first draft with their finished product.

That’s not fair.

So how do you conquer the fear of failure? It turns out improv rules can be a great guide for us. Try this:

Treat your writing time as play

When kids play, they don’t analyze how well they’re doing at stacking blocks or zooming around the room like a flying car. They just do it. Next time you write, try stuff. Ask, “What if?” What if I had the characters do this? What if I told the story in first person? What if I used a lot of sound words? And then just do it. You can analyze how it worked afterwards.

Repeat, “Yes and”

In the NPR interview, Jay Renshaw said, “We don’t say yes and enough. I mean, there’s a lot of no but, I think, in the United States, definitely. I think we could all stand to say yes and a little bit more.”

When you were a kid, you’d brainstorm dumb things to do with a friend, and someone would say, “Yes and we could…” and then someone else would add, “Yes and we could.” If there were no adults around, your ideas would get super ridiculous and very fun. That’s the energy you want to bring to your writing. When you get stuck, do a little “yes and” brainstorming. Don’t let your inner playground monitor show up. Just brainstorm.

Get a new mantra

If you’re a perfectionist, you have failure mantras running through your head. They’re the words of your inner critic, trying to protect you from getting hurt. Sometimes the inner critic needs new lines. Give it some. Here are a few to try:

“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.” -Samuel Beckett

“Progress, not perfection.”

“Just do it.”

“Big ideas start with small steps.”

“I can do hard things.”

Change, change, change!

Characters must change to make a story interesting. According to David Alger’s Rules of Improv, “Characters need to go on journeys, be altered by revelations, experience the ramifications of their choices and be moved by emotional moments.” Let your characters loose. If you’re writing about nonfiction, experiment and explore. If you’re stuck, change your scenery, change your approach, or change your project!

Take care of each other

Improv isn’t done alone. Performers are encouraged to make their partners look good on stage rather than setting up themselves for success.

Yes, you need time alone to write. But you’ll be more successful if you surround yourself with people who support you.

Get Help!

My Show Up and Write group provides you with the structure you need to get writing done. I am watching my clients finish chapters and books because of the program. Visit https://writenowcoach.com/show-up-and-write-writing-circles/ to sign up for the open session.

Read the interview about the Groundlings here: https://www.npr.org/2024/01/31/1228067587/the-groundlings-a-sketch-and-improv-troupe-in-la-celebrates-its-50th-anniversary

TL;DR

When work doesn’t work, we think we failed.

What if we saw our failure as feedback?

Take inspiration from improv and art: learn from failure.

Treat writing time as play by using “yes, and.”

Get support from others.