Overcome Perfectionism

by Rochelle Melander

Perfection is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a sh***y first draft.

—Anne Lamott

Are you a perfectionist? Do you

Have trouble completing tasks if you can’t do it perfectly?
Fear failure?
Worry that you’re going to get it wrong?
Pay too much attention to details?

As perfectionists, we’re often trying to do two different things at once: create and perfect. These two goals conflict with each other. When we create something new, such as writing a draft, our goal is to get words onto paper. We’re exploring ideas or telling a story.

It doesn’t help us to analyze our story or revise our writing while we’re getting it written. Later, when we edit the draft for content, flow, and grammar, we can work to improve it.

But when our perfectionist brain takes over, we squish the two tasks together and try to do both at one time. Of course this doesn’t work. It’s difficult to perfect a draft when we’re trying to get our ideas down on paper.

Recently, I started running again. I am slow, but I like the challenge. I’ve noticed that most runners don’t agonize over each step, wondering if they are doing it right. That would be silly. No one can analyze a race and run it at the same time. Runners put one foot in front of another, moving quickly (or slowly, in my case) toward their goal.

Writers can learn from runners. Don’t think so much. Just move forward. Get the words down on paper. You can fix it later.

This quest will help you overcome perfectionism and write.

The Quest

Step One: Set a Goal

What do you want to accomplish today? Write a paragraph? Tell a scene from your story? Write a query letter? Write down your goal.

Step Two: Lower Your Expectations

Review your goal. Is it doable? Is it small enough to fit the time you have allotted for writing? If you need to edit your piece in addition to writing it, then schedule extra time so that you don’t have to do both tasks at once.

Step Three: Set Your Intention

In the book Better Than Perfect, Elizabeth Lombardo suggests that we do better when we are fueled by passion, working toward what we want to experience versus avoiding what we fear. Writers often avoid writing because they fear that their work won’t be perfect. Instead of worrying about making the work perfect, choose one of the following intentions and use it to fuel your writing time:

Purpose: What do I want to accomplish with this? Who will I help?
Passion: What am I excited about in this story or idea?
Energy: What energizes me in this story or project?
Curiosity: What am I curious about?
Engagement: What ideas or parts of the story engage me?

Step Four: Write!

Using your specific intention, write.

Game Play Tips

Try out intentions until you find the one that helps you overcome perfection and write. You may need a different intention for each project or stage of a writing assignment.
Regular journaling can be a helpful antidote to perfectionism. Writing three rough pages a day will help you get in the habit of writing without expectations.
Whether writing is your profession, a vital part of your work, or an avocation that you hope will become your profession, it’s tempting to take it too seriously. Approaching your writing as play can help you overcome perfectionism and level up your writing. Next time you write, try to make it playful and fun. Use a new method for expressing yourself or experiment with a new format.

For the Win

Most perfectionists have been coping with this personality trait since childhood. Changing your behavior will take time and practice. Be patient with yourself.

Write Now! Coach Rochelle Melander is an ADHD-trained professional certified coach who has helped hundreds of people write and publish books. She’s available to help you create a plan for your writing project, overcome distraction and procrastination to start and finish your writing, and navigate publishing and marketing your book. Book a private consultation: https://writenowcoach.com/consultation/