Gifts to Cope with Challenging Times

by Rochelle Melander

When it comes to writing in chaotic times, there are tools most of us overlook: Rest. Renewal. Recovery.

When the fight is difficult, we might feel like there’s no time to rest. People need us. But if we’re going to be in this for the long hall, it’s important to take a break. We need to stop working and fill up on something nourishing.

A few months ago, I wrote about Charles Darwin and how much I learned from him. He was chronically ill and had to take breaks throughout the day. Mid-morning and after lunch, his wife Emma would read to him. He wrote in his autobiography that he liked romantic stories with happy endings: “I often bless all novelists. A surprising number have been read aloud to me…and I like all if moderately good, and if they do not end unhappily—against which a law ought to be passed. A novel, according to my taste, does not come into the first class unless it contains some person whom one can thoroughly love, and if it be a pretty woman all the better.” (Autobiography, 138-139)

But he wasn’t the only artist I came across who desired rest. In Journal of a Solitude, May Sarton talked about the clutter that accumulates in one’s mind when you don’t stop to reflect: “I feel cluttered when there is no time to analyze experience. That is the silt—unexplored experience that literally chokes the mind.” Sarton found relief and respite in nature. Like many writers, she loved tending her garden. She also wrote, “The most valuable thing we can do for the psyche, occasionally, is to let it rest, wander, live in the changing light of room, not try to be or do anything whatever.”

Inspired by Darwin, Sarton, and many others, for this year’s gift list, I’m focusing on items to encourage rest and renewal.

Books to read

If you’ve been following my work for any amount of time, you know that I’ve found great delight in a new genre called “cozy fiction” or “healing fiction.” I’ve written before about my absolute favorite book in the genre, What You are Looking for is in the Library by Michiko Aoyama. I have a few more of these books for you, along with a couple of other gems.

The Convenience Store by the Sea by Sonoko Machida (translated by Bruno Navasky)Visit the Tenderness Café, where the motto is “Caring for People, Caring for You,”no matter the cause. The movie-star handsome manager has his own fan club and people truly go out of their way to take care of each other.

The Second Chance Convenience Store by Kim Ho-yeon (translated by Janet Hong) (Yes, convenience stores are popular in cozy fiction—as are bookstores and cats!) The owner of a corner store takes in an unhoused man who does a good deed, a kind soul whose presence will transform the whole neighborhood. This heartwarming tale shows the power of community.

The Healing Season of Pottery by Yeon Somin (translated by Clare Richards). Feeling burned out, Jungmin quits her television news-writing job. In the empty days that follow, Jungmin stumbles upon a mysterious pottery studio, and feels immediately at home. Over the next year, Jungmin begins to heal and find hope for something new.

Dinner at the Night Library by Hika Harada (translated by Philip Gabriel). The night library contains the books of deceased famous writers. Not just the ones they wrote but also the ones they loved. When Otoha gets a job at the library, she finds her ideal life: she meets other book lovers and a legendary chef who prepares incredible meals for the library’s employees, inspired by the books. But can it last?

The Correspondent by Virgina Evans. Every day, Sybil Van Antwerp writes a letter—to her brother, to her best friend, to the president of the university who will not allow her to audit a class she desperately wants to take, to Joan Didion and Larry McMurtry to tell them what she thinks of their latest books, and to one person to whom she writes often yet never sends the letter. You’ll love this epistolary novel.  

Sipsworth by Simon Van Booy. Following the loss of her husband and son, Helen Cartwright returns to the village of her childhood after living abroad for six decades. Her only wish is to die quickly and without fuss. Then, one cold winter night, a chance encounter with a mouse sets Helen on a surprising journey. I’m planning on rereading this over the holidays—it was that good!

Shows to Watch

I recommend everyone get a membership to PBS Passport. It’s not as pricey as the other streaming services, and it opens up so much amazing television. The shows I turn to for comfort and fun are:

Seaside Hotel. Visit Andersen’s Seaside Hotel by the North Sea dunes for an elegant and dramatic soap opera. (In Danish with English subtitles)

All Creatures Great and Small. This is the series about James Herriot’s adventures as a veterinarian in 1930’s Yorkshire—but it’s a whole new adaptation.

The Durrells in Corfu. This is a hilarious adaptation of Gerald Durrell’s memoir, My Family and Other Animals and its two sequels.

A Journal to Inspire

Several years ago, I purchased a journal and filled it with love letters and sweet quotes for my husband. It made a great Christmas gift that he’d held onto over the years. Find a journal you like (or make your own out of an old book) and fill it with:

+Inspiring writing and reading quotes (Goodreads has a great collection quotes on  writing and reading.)

+Quotes from your favorite books

+Encouraging notes from you

+Images from magazines, postcards, and old books

Twist: Make a “You Rock” Journal for yourself by copying or pasting in your favorite “you rock” letters from editors, readers, and friends.

A Getaway Bag

My artist friends rent studios. It gets them out of the house—and gives them a place to make messes. I don’t need a big space to write. But I do need to get aways sometimes. I’ve always liked the idea of having a portable office. Today that’s easy. For the writer in your life (or yourself!), purchase a sturdy tote. I like the totes made from recycled feed and cement bags. (Try the bags from Malia, whose mission is “to increase economic opportunity for women in Cambodia and to support organizations that fight human trafficking in Southeast Asia.” https://maliadesigns.com/collections/shoulder-bags-totes

Fill the bag with:

+An empty journal or notebook

+Cool pens

+Mechanical pencils

+Bookmark sticky notes

+An inspiring writing book

For writing books, I’d recommend:

The Way of the Fearless Writer by Beth Kempton

Level Up: Quests to Master Mindset, Overcome Procrastination, and Increase Productivity

The Book of Alchemy: A Creative Practice for an Inspired Life by Sulieka Jaohad

Brilliant Year Workbooks by Leonie Dawson

An Experience

In my family, we’ve stopped giving stacks of holiday gifts every year. Instead, we choose an experience or adventure to take together. This year, we’ve gone to movies, walked through the Chicago Botanical Garden’s Lightscape at the Garden, and eaten many meals together.

+A conference. Poets & Writers maintains a list of writing conferences and residencies: https://www.pw.org/conferences_and_residencies

+An author event. I’ve been lucky enough to live near an independent bookstore for the last 20 years. I’ve seen famous writers in person before and after they made the big time. Gift a writer friend with an outing to a book talk by one of their favorite writers—and buy the book for them so they can have the experience of a meeting a treasured author.

+A coaching session. When your friends are struggling with how to overcome writer’s block, choose a book project, or build a platform—you may not know how to help them. Though you can listen and ask questions, it’s tough to be objective. Think about giving them a session with a writing coach.

And if you’re interested in Group coaching—starting in January—you can sign up here. And here’s a bonus for you: Everyone who signs up for group coaching before December 31^st gets a bonus session (30 minutes) to be used anytime before June 2026.

A final word

The best thing you could give a writer—or reader, for that matter—is time. So, if none of these amazing gifts seem quite right, then offer to create some extra time for the writer in your life. Take care of their kids, walk their dogs, or cook them a meal so that they can spend an extra hour at the keyboard.